my family... i have loved all my life...

i grew up in a family close knit to each other... my father was a government employee. until now he serves the people in our town church during his free time.. he simply have a big heart for everybody.. my mother also worked for the government and managed to have a small business.. she is a business woman by heart.. doesnt always stay at home and always busy.. she is not the usual type of mothers that will always stay by your side to comfort you, she's the busy mother type, so i grew up more closer with my father... my two bothers are smart but both very shy persons, i was the only girl among us three kids... i am also close with my two brothers, both of them share some of their secrets with me, i sometimes go with my eldest brother to his university dorm and go with him and his girlfriend in their special dates.. mostly i hang out with my eldest brother because he wants to tag me along all the time.... my elder brother always talk to me about something, he is a little bit more mature than my eldest brother, he likes to share his thoughts to me, he is the one who always have something in the heart... thinks so much and involves himself so much to anything.... but he is the most silent among us three.... when we are in the house, we fight, regarding doing each one's chores but mostly we have fun together, we would sit altogether and sing a song.. both of them can play the guitar.. my elder brother can play almost all instruments he will touch.. and he sings very well, he is my greatest influence in singing.. during school vacation, we mingle with all our cousins in the patio of my uncle and we will all sing together.. our family loves music so much so i grew up with music...

God blessed me with a good family.. my father respected my mother so much, i never see them very sweet together but they stayed very long together... i idolized my father so much, when i was very young i told to myself i wish i can find somebody that is as good hearted as my father... i never hear my father talk bad to people and even do bad to people... i wish i am like him... my mother is the oppossite of my father, she talks too much and makes so many enemies... but my mother is a good wife because she never did anything to break her vow to my father.... i am not very close to my mother when i was young until i got married because of her character but eventhough she's like that, i love her also same like i love my father.. the relationship of my parents are not the ideal relationship as i can see before when i was a teenager, because they are not sweet, it seems like they dont care for each other... they dont care where the other one goes and who they go with... but if one never go home on time, they feel bad about it... i envy some of my friends' parents that even in their old days they still can manage to be sweet to each other...

i said to myself that time that if i will have a husband, i will see to it that we will grow old sweet to each other.. my family is closely knit to each other but we lack talking to each other, especially my parents, my father is the silent type, so he never talk to us about life... our mother is always busy, the only people that talk to me about life when i was young was my aunts and uncles which sounded annoying to me that time hehehe, (i should've listened to them), sometimes my brothers, but they are also still very young that time... so for relationships, i have less idea and knowledge about it.. my family is close to God, my parents brought us always praying to God, so in my childhood i never engaged too early in sexual relationships, i never studied very well about this, never paid too much attention... i am the person who would go home after class and never goes out to party much, unlike the other boys and girls my age... i go out with friends but not always.. they always call me the "slippery neck" because everytime they need me around in parties and gimmicks i am nowhere to be found... same like my brothers, i never see them go out too much to party, my eldest brother always go with his brods and sisses in his university organization but for a good cause... my elder brother.. same... but most of their time is spent in our town church.. we are active members of our town church... that was the most happy time i had with my family, we go out together in church activities, and we have the same aims, we do common things together... that makes my family happy... eventhough i had something for my mother before that i am not happy about, all these are all gone now... before i never talk to her about my secrets, simply because she's always busy and she doesnt like to pay attention, but now that she's old, everything i have in my heart, she knows and she understands me.. she supports me even in the most dark place... same with my father, my father supported me eversince... with his kind words.... and my brothers.... they are always there for me, even now that i am so far from them, i can still feel that they are just beside me... we constantly talk in the internet.. we are in different parts of the world... now my parents are in philippines only with my little kid... who makes them happy... i support them and they support me as well... i am dreaming of taking them to where i am now.. it's very hard for me... i dont have enough money to take them to where i am and i am not in the ideal position still... i still dont have a permanent job... i love to have them by my side... i love my family so much... no matter how unperfect we are and we will become.... i just hope i can take them here with me and be happy again.... i hope God will help me succeed so i can support them more and let them feel the comfortability of living out from poverty and heartaches...... God Bless my parents, and my brothers... and most especially my 2 lovely kids.....